Sunday, October 20th, 2013

Do you ever think about me?

I wonder, because I think about you a lot still. I imagine that you don’t think about me anymore. But isn’t that what all dumped boyfriends think? You did have a two month head start on getting over me, since it took you that long to actually break up with after you knew you wanted to. So maybe in two more months I’ll have moved on and not think about you anymore.

I don’t know if that’s a good or bad thing, though.

I don’t want to forget the time we spent together. It’s probably been the best year and a half of my life. That doesn’t take much when you’re only twenty-five, I guess. But still, I don’t want to forget about you completely.

Then again, every time I think about you now I get a queasy feeling like all the air’s been knocked out of me. I want to get to a place where I don’t miss you but where I still remember you. That seems impossible right now. But maybe over time my feelings will morph into something sweeter – nostalgia or fond memories of the past. Maybe I won’t feel the same pricks of pain when I think about you.

Still, I wish I knew whether or not you thought about me. It’d be a good thermometer to know how long I’m going to feel the pain of missing you.

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